ACCURACY
VS. READABILITY An example of different choices made by translators when balancing accuracy against readability can be seen in the boxes below. These are four translations of the words used by the Samsas' cleaning-woman, in Part III of The Metamorphosis when she discovers Gregor's dead body.
In the original version, the maid announces that Gregor is dead by using the German word krepiert. Translated literally, this word simply means dead, but German readers would immediately recognize this as a colloquial, or slang word, not the usual word for dead. In fact whenever the cleaning-woman speaks, her language is filled with colloquial expressions that contrast with the more formal, middle-class speech of the Samsa family. The problem for translators is to find English equivalents for these colloquial expressions. The examples above illustrate different ways of translating the cleaning-woman's announcement that Gregor is dead -- the Muirs have her say that Gregor is dead and done for; Appelbaum uses the words croaked and a total goner; Underwood has snuffed it and dead as a doornail; and Neugroschel prefers croaked, absolutely croaked. You can probably think of many other expressions that could be used; the important point here is that all four translators are placing readability above accuracy, choosing to communicate the cleaning-woman's way of speaking rather than giving a literal translation. Now let's look at a slightly less obvious example of this same kind of choice. In the boxes below, you'll see two translations of a sentence in Part II of The Metamorphosis. At this point in the story, Gregor's sister, Grete, is insisting to her mother that the furniture must be moved out of Gregor's room. I've highlighted the words that you should compare.
Here the translators have made different kinds of choices. Pasley's version follows Kafka's original wordings very closely. He uses phrases that are almost literal translations of the original German: she refused to let herself be swayed from her resolve by her mother and soon grew silent. In contrast, Neugroschel prefers colloquial expressions: she dug in her heels, refusing to give in and soon held her tongue, expressions that sound natural in modern English but aren't word-for-word translations of the original German. In one important respect, however, Neugroschel's version is more literal than Pasley's. You may have noticed that, in referring to Mrs. Samsa, Neugroschel uses the words the mother in contrast to Pasley's her mother. This follows the original wording very closely; in the original version Gregor's family is referred to, throughout the story, as the mother, the father, and the sister. Translators have to decide which form to use -- his mother, which sounds more natural in English, or the mother, the form used in the original German. Some translators feel that the mother should be changed to his mother in order to avoid a phrasing that's unnatural in English. Others maintain that the mother must be translated literally because Kafka deliberately chose this wording; they believe the phrasing is meant to emphasize Gregor's alienation from his parents. Which is best? Again, there's no definitive answer to this question since Kafka never explained the details of how he wrote his story. The next page will continue this discussion by focusing on stylistic issues involved in translating The Metamorphosis. But before you go on, the exercise below will give you the chance to be a "translator." EXERCISE B. Following are two versions of a passage in Part I of The Metamorphosis, where Gregor Samsa, having just awakened and realized that something is definitely wrong with him, is thinking about his life. After you've read both versions, write your own version of the same passage. Your aim is to write this in a way that will be interesting and readable for a modern person like yourself; you don't have to follow the word orders exactly and you can use informal language, including slang words, if you wish. If you like, you can write this as if it's about yourself -- what you're thinking about when you wake up in the morning and don't really want to get out of bed.
When you've finished the exercises, go to Page 3. comments to: vpoulakis@nvcc.edu 11/11/05
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