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THE ILIAD (Page 4)
SOUND Finally, after
accuracy and sense, a translator also has to think about how the translation will sound. As
you're probably aware, some languages contain sounds that don't exist in other languages. A French word, for example, that may look similar to an English word can be pronounced very
differently. These differences become especially important when translating poetry because poems (like songs)
rely heavily on sound to convey their meaning.
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To illustrate the problems involved in translating the sound of a
poem, let's look at a few lines from the last part of the Iliad.
This is the very moving passage in Book XXIV, where Andromache
expresses her terrible grief after the death of her husband, Hector. Both translations
of this passage are by Robert Fagles, but in the second box I've changed the
format from
poetry to prose.
O my husband...
cut off from life so young ! You leave me a widow,
lost in the royal halls -- and the boy is only a baby,
the son we bore together, you and I so doomed.
I cannot think he will ever come to manhood.
Long before that the city will be sacked,
plundered top to bottom! Because you are dead,
her great guardian, you who always defended Troy,
who kept her loyal wives and helpless children safe,
all who will soon be carried off in the hollow ships
and I with them ....
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O my husband ... cut off from
life so young! You leave me a widow, lost in the royal halls -- and the boy is only a baby, the son we bore
together, you and I so doomed. I cannot think he will ever come to manhood. Long before that the city will be sacked, plundered top to bottom! Because you are dead, her great guardian, you who always defended Troy, who kept her loyal wives and helpless children safe,
all who will soon be carried off in the hollow ships and I with them ....
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If possible, read both versions aloud. You'll notice that the rhythm of your
reading is different. As you were reading the first version, you probably paused slightly as you moved from one line
to the next, but reading the second version, your pauses
would have occurred only at punctuation marks such as periods, commas, and dashes. Poetry is arranged by lines; prose writing is not. This means
that when translating poetry, a translator must try to arrange the lines so they will
reproduce (as much as possible) the sound of the original poem.
Translating the sound of ancient Greek into modern English is especially difficult because the poetic line that is most natural in the English
language has five stressed syllables (pentameter) whereas Homer's poem has a longer line
(hexameter) and is based on the lengths of syllables
rather than stresses. Some translators have tried to translate the Iliad by
using the hexameter form, but it's difficult to do this in English. The
following example illustrates one translator's attempt:
My husband, you were lost young from
life, and have left me
a widow in your house, and the boy is only a baby
who was born to you and me, the unhappy. I think he will never
come of age, for before then head to heel this city
will be sacked, for you, its defender, are gone, you who guarded
the city, and the grave wives, and the innocent children,
wives who before long must go away in the hollow ships,
and among them I shall also go....
-- Richmond Lattimore |
And here is another version which uses a very short, non-hexameter line. Note the
difference in how it looks and sounds:
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You have died young, husband, and left me
A widow in the halls. Our son is still an infant,
Doomed when we bore him. I do not think
He will ever reach manhood. No, this city
Will topple and fall first. You were its savior,
And now you are lost. All the solemn wives
And children you guarded will go off soon
In the hollow ships, and I will go with them.
--- Stanley Lombardo
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Stanley Lombardo, whose translation is in the box immediately above, has said that his translation was intended for oral performance
(similar to the way that the Iliad was originally performed), so he used
short lines that would be easy to say. Lattimore's purpose, however, was
to follow the line-forms of the original poem as closely as possible. Therefore
his longer lines, though harder for a modern-day person to recite, fulfill his
goal of reproducing the sound of the original writing.
Each translator had a different purpose that determined the form of his
translation. As is always the case, these translators had to make difficult
choices before they could create their translations -- since no one translation
can fully capture the meaning, the sense, and the sound of the original work.
EXERCISE D.
Similar to what you did in Exercise C, write your own "translation"
of the passage that's quoted above (Book XXIV, lines 852-62, where
Andromache is expressing her grief).)
You can use any style you choose -- poetry or prose -- as long as you keep the
main idea. It's a very sad, heart-rending, passage, so feel free to use
emotional words.
Top
of Page
When you've finished,
proceed to Page 5, the final page.
comments to vpoulakis@nvcc.edu
03/28/05
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